Bali makes it easy to meet people whose lives look completely different from our own. At one table there may be an entrepreneur, artist, hospitality professional, parent, investor, teacher, designer, or someone who has recently left an entirely different career behind. People arrive from different countries, cultures, industries, and stages of life, often carrying experiences that would never normally cross paths.
Yet diversity alone does not automatically create understanding. Two people can sit beside each other for an hour and still learn very little beyond where they live and what they do. The difference often comes down to curiosity. One reflection describes curiosity as one of the most important principles in networking and asks a deceptively simple question: “How curious are you to the people in your network?”
It is easy to think we already know the people around us. We know their profession, where they live, perhaps the company they work for or the project they are building. We may follow their social media and recognise where they spend their weekends, but knowing information about someone is not the same as being curious about them. Curiosity begins when we stop assuming that the obvious facts are the whole story.
A restaurant owner may also be a musician. A successful founder may be quietly reconsidering the direction of their life. Someone who appears confident at every event may find social situations exhausting. A person who recently arrived in Bali may have spent decades building expertise somewhere else. Most people are far more complex than the introduction they give when asked, “What do you do?”
This is particularly important in Bali because introductions happen constantly. New people arrive, communities overlap, and someone may attend several gatherings in a week and repeat the same explanation of who they are several times. After a while, conversation can become automatic: Where are you from? How long have you been in Bali? What do you do? Where do you live? These questions are useful because they give two strangers somewhere to begin, but the conversation becomes more meaningful when curiosity moves beyond the familiar introduction.
The next question may be what brought someone here at this point in their life, what has recently changed, what they are trying to understand, or what kind of community they hope to find. None of these questions is extraordinary. What changes the conversation is the intention behind them. A good question is not simply a networking technique. It is an invitation that tells another person there is room for more than their title.
This becomes increasingly valuable in environments where people often feel pressure to present themselves well. Bali attracts ambitious people, and many social gatherings contain an invisible layer of professional positioning. People explain what they are building, where they have worked, what is launching next, or which communities they belong to. There is nothing wrong with sharing achievements, but when everyone is presenting, very little discovery happens.
One of the podcast reflections behind this idea puts it simply: “If you want people to be interested in you, you must be interested in them.” This shifts the purpose of conversation. Instead of asking how to become memorable, the better question may be what can genuinely be discovered about the person in front of us.
People can usually recognise the difference between someone who is waiting for their turn to speak and someone who is genuinely paying attention. Curiosity appears in the follow-up question, in remembering something mentioned earlier, and in allowing a conversation to go somewhere unexpected rather than immediately trying to offer advice or create an opportunity.
This does not mean asking deeply personal questions too quickly. Curiosity should still respect privacy, context, and cultural differences. Some people enjoy discussing their personal life immediately, while others need time before they feel comfortable sharing more. Good curiosity includes sensitivity. It notices when another person wants to continue and when they would prefer to change the subject.
This is particularly relevant in Bali’s international communities, where communication styles vary widely. In some cultures, direct questions are normal. In others, relationships develop more gradually. Some people speak openly with strangers, while others place greater importance on trust built through repeated meetings. Curiosity therefore involves more than asking questions. It also means observing how someone responds, what subjects create energy, and what seems important to them.
The same principle applies to people we already know. It may actually be easier to remain curious about a stranger than about a friend, partner, colleague, or family member. With familiar people, we begin to believe we already know what they think. We predict their opinions, finish their sentences, and assume their preferences have remained unchanged. Yet people continue evolving even when we see them regularly.
Someone we have known for ten years may have developed a new interest we have never asked about. A colleague may want something very different from their career than they did two years ago. A friend may have changed significantly while still appearing familiar. Curiosity keeps relationships from becoming fixed.
This idea connects naturally with the earlier articles in this series. Meaningful connection requires courage to begin, belonging requires participation and trust, relationships need reconnection, and networks evolve as people change. Curiosity sits underneath all of these stages. Without it, we may meet people without ever really discovering them.
Curiosity can also improve professional collaboration. Many misunderstandings begin because people move too quickly toward solutions. A business owner assumes they understand what a partner wants. A manager believes they know why an employee is struggling. A client explains a problem and receives a solution before they have finished describing it. Asking one more thoughtful question can change the outcome.
Bali’s business and hospitality communities depend heavily on relationships across cultures, industries, and backgrounds. In these environments, curiosity can prevent assumptions from becoming expensive mistakes. It can reveal what a customer actually values, help a newcomer understand local context, or help collaborators recognise that they may be using the same words but meaning different things.
Modern technology also gives us the feeling that almost everything can be known quickly. We can search someone before meeting them, view their professional history, see photographs of their life, and understand their interests through what they share publicly. But a profile is not a person. Sometimes the most meaningful information is the part nobody thought to post.
Bali provides countless opportunities to practise this because the island repeatedly places unfamiliar people beside one another. The opportunity is not simply to meet more of them, but to become more interested in the people already in front of us.
Who in your life do you think you already know well enough to stop asking questions?
