Embracing Unity in Diversity - A Practice I Learned the Hard Way

“I am born alone, in the world alone, and I die alone.”

That was my mantra as a child in two multicultural children’s homes in London. It was a survival belief-part shield, part explanation for the sense of separation that defined those early years.

It took me nearly four decades to understand a deeper truth the opposite of Separation is UNITY which is not necessarily given, it is forged, and how we meet conflict determines who we become as individuals, communities, and societies. I learnt this through experiences growing up like this;

“I felt a fist slam into my jaw.
Another cracked across the bridge of my nose.
The metallic taste of blood spilling over my lip.

Knocked down again!

I hated Darren.

A skinny white kid, a few years older than me. Every time I was forced to fight him in the children’s home, my stomach would sink as I knew I’d lose.

Then, weeks later, everything changed.

We were in the living room when it started.

Tyres screeching.
Engines screaming.
Shouts from the front yard.
Then glass shattering everywhere. Chaos.

They came thirty deep.

Bats. Clubs. Anything they could swing.

We were under siege!

And in that moment out of pure fear, chaos, confusion and instinct, Darren and I, along with the other orphans, fought for each other, not against each other. Our differences disappeared, we became brothers and sisters united.

My relationship with Darren was never the same again. mutual respect. Even love.

I realised something profound.

If I, a Black kid, beaten up by a white kid he hated could find common ground, unity in diversity, then I could find it with anyone.

Fast forward forty years, and those early lessons paid for in blood, fear, and survival have become the foundation of my life’s work (purpose).

I now find myself on global stages, sharing lived insights and philosophies such as Bhinneka Tunggal Ika (Unity in Diversity), Gotong Royong, Tri Kaya Parisuda, and Ubuntu not as concepts, but as embodied truths.

Using my voice with a dose of humour and lived experiences to open hearts, unite cultures, and shift how humanity leads itself.

When I look at the world today, I see division. Separation. Disunity. Fear. Violence.

But I also see hope – a force of the same magnitude in the opposite direction

It’s no surprise I was drawn to Indonesia a nation whose national motto is Unity in Diversity, where Gotong Royong lives not as theory but a practice: communities coming together to solve challenges faced by the community.

I facilitate these principles while leading from stage platforms such as:

On Stage From Bali Ocean Days Conference & Showcase 2026, Intercontinental Bali Resort

Bali Ocean Days, now one of the most prominent annual conferences addressing ocean use and conservation (National/International Private, public sector stakeholders, NGO’s and scientists.

On Stage From IUCN Congress in Abu Dhabi late 2025

IUCN World Conservation Congress, one of the largest nature congress’s on earth (Abu Dhabi late 2025)

On stage I AM Creation Summit late 2025, The Meru Sanur

I AM Creation Summit, focused on human transformation

SpeakuP Monday – Destination Indonesia in-person and livestream Entrepreurship & Social Impact Weekly Talkshow episode 510 with Will Travis from Elevation Barn

And SpeakuP Monday – Destination Indonesia weekly Talkshow (500+ episodes, 1,000+ guests, 10,000+ in person audience) where people inspire people through entrepreneurship, unity, and social impact

Based upon a varied experience as a promoter; more than 2,500 events with over 1.5 million people in-person, as a coach (and relationship coach), entrepreneur, strategist, and author, I chanced upon and observed A three-step pathway which worked again and again for creating harmony, overcoming division, and building community I later recognised the same pattern echoed in Jon Meacham’s book, The Soul of America.

How to Create Mutual Harmony, Respect, and Understanding

First, we must suspend what we believe to be true (It’s okay you can come back to it later.)

Then, genuinely commit to:

Curiosity – See Each Other
Ask questions. Understand where someone grew up, the circumstances that shaped them, the influences that informed their worldview.

Humility – Learn About One Another
Had I grown up under the same conditions, surrounded by the same narratives, I would probably hold the same beliefs.

Empathy – Work Together
Even if I still disagree, I now understand why their belief makes sense to them.

This applies even at an energetic level.

You know that moment when someone walks into a room and you immediately decide whether you like them or not? Before a word is spoken. You like or don’t like “their vibe” or “swag”

Transforming Judgement without contact.

Moving through curiosity, humility, and empathy directly or vicariously cuts through, nullifies or cancels out that invisible energetic wall (regardless of their vibe or swag). Now, you can actually see and hear each other (often without ego).

I see this same pattern reflected in Sky Blue Sea Foundation’s, Bali Ocean Days Conference and Showcase over the past 3 years.

• Year One: Can we bring/unify government and private sector in the same room?
• Year Two: Can we create genuine collaborative discourse/actions?
• Year Three: Can we move faster towards solutions, partnerships, and action?

This year was the most successful yet.